My mind is gone...

Charlie... I have been so sick from my stomach I'd say it's my nerves but IDK! I've been thinking of you so much these past few days. Today I went to MA and while sitting in the back seat of the car with your Tia C. I started to look at your pictures and while the memories made me happy at that moment the effect it had on me after I had breakfast and was getting home ahhhhh I was just so irritated with everything and I couldn't really put my finger on what it was so I went out with Gio to B&N. You know I never knew how that would bug me so much going in their and knowing that you would never walk in all giddy about getting some New Manga book or other type of book it just brought me down even more. I was with Gio and he wanted to go to the Manga aisle b/c you taught him so well he knows so much and he told me that if he read them he would feel closer to you and if I thought that you would come mess with him if he read the books... sighhhh my heart sank and I wanted to close my eyes and scream! He really is so smart and dealing with everything in his own way it felt really good to be with just him I came home and cleaned for a good 2 hours. I fixed up the dining room, living room and kitchen I finally got rid of all the mail that was piled for over a month and I'm really not thinking like I should I keep losing my train of thought and my words escape me right now.. so I'll leave you with this..... I love you Charlie...

There are times when it is hard to believe in the future, when we are temporarily just not brave enough. When this happens, concentrate on the present. ...Cultivate le petit bonheur (the little happiness) until courage returns. Look forward to the promise of . . . a good sleep . . . the likelihood that tonight the stars will shine. Sink roots into the present until the strength grows to think about tomorrow ~ Ardis Whitman